Its been said not to live with your beau unless he puts a ring on it, but nowadays who’s really getting married? Countless friends of mine are jumping onboard to live with their boo before walking down the aisle.
I’ve done it and its something I support especially if you’re involved in a healthy relationship heading in a unanimous direction. This may be a shocker, but not everyone wants to be married either. However, if you do want to dive into sharing household keys there are some bases to cover.
First things first, be patient before signing anything and packing your bags. There really isn’t a “right time” when to do so, but you must have the discussion prior to moving forward. Expectations are literally everything so place all concerns on the table.
It won’t be easy, but worth it in the long run.
I had this problem with roommates in the past and I wasn’t about to make this another crash and burn situation. Living with another person can be a rollercoaster especially when there’s bad communication. Get out of your feelings and speak with the intent to really listen to one another.
I’m not perfect at this and still a work in progress if I’m being honest.
The biggest lesson I’ve learned in shacking up is our difference in how a home should be run. For example, I come from a two parent household where it takes a team effort in nearly everything. He on the other hand comes from a one parent household with his mother and sisters. That alone molded us differently.
With that said we’ve had to discuss opposite perspectives to fully understand where the other is coming from. This won’t happen overnight, but is doable.
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Living with your boo really gives you a close up to who they are. For example, if someone is a little messy its pretty evident early on.
Trust I’ve had a first bird’s eye view. For example, my boo isn’t the best at putting nearly anything away especially his laundry and oddly caps. Ask me why. I wish I could tell you.
if successful the two of you can gain a deep understanding of one another outside of sex. Nothing compares to the late night chats about life and creating future plans. While other traditional relationships are learning how to understand on another under one roof as newlyweds you’re getting ahead start.
Shacking up gives you the strength to grow as one or apart in some cases. You're even given the chance to see what you’re willing to compromise. As we all know by now relationships are all about compromising.
Financially speaking this can be an absolutely beneficial opportunity. Life isn’t cheap and it costs money really enjoy it. Sharing one roof reveals how one another spends money or saves.
I see these as essentials to building a future with someone.
The next time someone questions, “Why are you giving the milk or free?” Know your gaining a lot more than milk in the end.
***Disclaimer it took be 1 year and half before moving in with my boo.***