What To Do After Coming Out
What To Do After Coming Out

You’re out of the closet and wondering to yourself, now what? 

 

No, worries I got you covered!

 

By this point you’ve gained self-confidence in who you are and naturally yearning for like minded individuals. I was no different and searched high and low for them. 

 

Discovering these friends will take time similar to finding a good man. Sharing the same sexual orientation as another doesn’t mean you’re meant to be besties. There were plenty of gay men I came across after coming out I shared little to no interest with. 

 

Relating to like minded guys is definitely a plus on this journey. I didn’t come across my clique until around the age of 23. By the way I came out at 19/20. 

 

I guess you can call me a slowpoke, but I eventually crossed paths with them. 

 

It mainly happened at places I worked oppose to the club or gym. Yes, these are stereotypical places. Beware. You will have to step outside your comfort zone and maybe even be the first to speak.

 

This is an organic experience where the conversation flows effortlessly. You’ll know once you come across the right ones who make your path to self discovery that much sweeter. The feeling is instantaneous.

 

Girls are still fabulous friends, but they cannot fully relate and understand the shoes of a gay man. Although they may carry the compassion of wanting to know, only a gay man fully understands your experience. 

 

What To Do After Coming Out

 

Where To Meet Your Gay Bestie

 

Work 

 

As mentioned work has been an ideal spot to meet friends. The convenience of chatting and spending the work day with one another helps the day go by quicker. Might I add this makes a perfect lunch buddy during too. 

 

Retail Stores

 

It maybe a little cliche, but meeting other gay men at stores you shop at is great. If they share the same or a similar fashion sense this makes it even better! Go for it!

 

Facebook Groups

 

Facebook groups are perfection. When meeting other gay men in your area. It's the easiest way to tap into someone's mindset. We are the generation of over sharing. You can establish a platonic friendship from the get go and dismiss the pressure of anything romantic. Make sure to keep the conversation easy and friendly to see where things go naturally. 

 

Gay Bars | Restaurants 

 

Be careful here cause you might step into something you’re not looking for. Seek out the spots that are more of a lounge feel. It will be easier to socialize and chat with others. Don’t buy anyone a drink either, you might give the wrong signal. 

 

MeetUp.com 

 

This helps with being around those who are looking for the same thing you are. Right off the bat each meet up group is catered to what your needs are. If you even need to become the host and start your own group... do it! 

 

Dating Apps 

 

THIS IS A LAST RESORT. THIS IS A LAST RESORT. 

 

I don’t condone using dating apps looking for friends because every person has a different motive. Although yours may be innocent you can't say the same for others. However, on your profile you can specify, “ONLY FRIENDS” in hopes someone will take heed of what you’re looking for. 

 

Give yourself time in finding your ideal clique there’s no rush and it’ll be worth it in the long run!